In our lives, we often face situations where we have to make choices. Sometimes, these choices are simple, but often, they put us in front of contradictions. For example, we may feel the need to be both good and evil, both beautiful and ugly, both gentle and tough. These contradictions can create confusion and insecurity.
Polarity of the Self
Polarity of the self refers to the fact that each of us has within us both positive and negative parts. These parts are often in conflict with each other, creating inner tension.
The positive parts of the self are the ones that make us good, beautiful, gentle, happy, etc. These parts bring us fulfillment and make us feel good in our skin.
The negative parts of the self are the ones that make us evil, ugly, tough, unhappy, etc. These parts can bring us unhappiness and prevent us from reaching our full potential.
Congruence of the Self
Congruence of the self refers to the fact that we accept and integrate both the positive and negative parts of our self. When we are congruent with ourselves, we feel fulfilled and authentic.
When we deny our negative parts, they remain within us, subconsciously, and can create problems for us. For example, if we deny our negative side, the one that is evil, it can manifest itself in destructive behaviors, such as aggression or self-destruction.
When we accept our negative parts, it does not mean that we have to behave in a negative way. It means that we recognize them and integrate them into our personality, so that they no longer control us.
How to Become Congruent with Ourselves
To become congruent with ourselves, it is important to get to know ourselves better. We need to be mindful of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. When we observe our negative parts, we should not judge or reject them. We need to accept them as part of us, with compassion and understanding.
We can also help ourselves to become congruent with ourselves through the practice of mindfulness. Mindfulness is a technique that helps us to be present in the present moment, without being judgmental. When we are mindful, we can observe our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors without interpreting or judging them. This can help us to accept ourselves better, with all of our aspects.
Conclusion
Polarity of the self is a reality of our lives. Each of us has within us both positive and negative parts. To be happy and fulfilled, it is important to accept and integrate both the positive and negative parts of our self.
Here are some additional thoughts on polarity and congruence of the self:
- Polarity is not a bad thing. In fact, it is essential to our growth and development. Without polarity, we would not be able to experience the full range of human emotions and experiences.
- Congruence does not mean that we have to be perfect. It simply means that we are honest with ourselves about who we are, both our positive and negative qualities.
- The journey to congruence is a lifelong one. It takes time and effort to accept all parts of ourselves.
If you are struggling with polarity or congruence in your own life, there are many resources available to help you. You can talk to a therapist, counselor, or other mental health professional. There are also many books and websites that offer guidance on this topic.