How you see yourself and how others see you (Part II)
The way you see yourself can be pretty similar to the way others perceive you but can also differ quite a lot. In which cases those images correspond to each other and what to do to correct our self-image. About this thing, we will discuss in this article.
When self-image and foreign-image correspond…
In this case, the big-five personality characteristics correspond:
- Extroversion: We know, if people see us as being extrovert or introvert people. And the longer we know a person the better we know how one sees us and that we are perceived correctly.
- Agreeableness: We can estimate pretty well if we are seen as easygoing people, or if we are a little bit difficult and quarrelsome.
- Consciousness: We receive often feedback if we are a person who takes time for others, sticks to one’s commitment, delivers tasks on time, reliable and trustworthy.
- Openness: If we are open and curious making new experiences and if we are searching them actively is often observed by people, who surround us.
- Neuroticism: If we are emotionally stable or unstable is easy to observe: anxiousness, irritability, impulsivity, sensibility define one person as being emotionally unstable.
In social circles, characteristics like extroversion, consciousness, and neuroticism are recognized pretty fast, whereas in longer and more profound relationships openness and agreeableness are much more important.
Some people can also be read like an open book because they tell everything about themselves. Those are usually extrovert, emotionally stable and open people. On the other hand, introvert people are much more difficult to decipher.
But how to be sure if you estimate a person correctly, or if this one is only playing a role? The best way to do this is to take time and to observe this person in many different situations and contexts. Only then you can judge one person correctly because the true personality traits are stable across all situations.
…and what to do to correct our self-image
One method is simply to ask for feedback: to receive information if other people see us correctly in order to correct our self-image we have to know which impact we have on others. The best way to do this is to ask many but also different people, but also people we do not sympathize with.
The second method is very useful to find out more about our verbal and nonverbal communication and body language. Hereby make a short video of yourself while you are in a social situation. This will give you pretty much information on how you present yourself in the interaction with others.